"5pm" by DS Maolalai
I looked at my fingers. it was almost time
for her to get her train
and I looked at my fingers and said "I should cut
my nails shorter" and she said
"yes, I was thinking that.
it was kind of uncomfortable
there when you were fingering me." I looked at her
and she looked at me
like a bruised apple, all pink cheeks and eyes,
and I said "so why didn't you tell me then?" and she said
"then you would have stopped
and I didn't want you
to stop." she got up
out of my shoulder
and stretched, the light through the curtain
staining her burnt umber, her breast flattening
as it followed the movement of her arm,
then flopping backwards
like an apple
hanging on a string. the bed moved a little
and my body slipped sideways
into the warmth which her body
had left. "you're always so anxious
about these things," she said. "I'm not," I said. "you are"
and it was true - I wouldn't want to hurt her. would have stopped.
but there were other things
I could have put there, I thought, and pressed myself
up from the mattress
to find some socks
before we walked to the train. it was 5pm. always
so strange, getting dressed a second time
the same day. like resetting a computer
by holding down the off button. something violent
about having been asleep,
wrapped up together, and then waking up
to half-worn clothes
and doing things
with only a few hours
til bedtime.
"To Natalie" by DS Maolalai
grabbing my arms
and twisting; the past
like a good fighter,
better by far
than me. this morning
my girlfriend now
showed me a video - some guy
fighting airport security
after they tasered
his wife - and asked if I'd do that
were it to happen
to her. I said
I'd gladly try
but lose
worse than he did. I can't fight
anything, even
on equal
ground. and memory
sneaks up
like a mugger
and grabs me anyway. sometimes
I can't help
but google
your name.
"Canada Geese" by DS Maolalai
they landed
all around the hospital
like bags of inflated air
but heavier; dropping
hailstones
and padded rocks. the hospital
was a new building - the most advanced, apparently,
in the hemisphere - but in construction
they had not taken account
the whips and roaming
flightpaths
of migrating canada
geese. we were told
to monitor them as they landed
and to call management
if any built nests
on the rooftop; they had to be dealt with then
by special men
with nets and heated
boxes
for the eggs.
and we had guards too,
at the entrance - it seemed
the birds got violent
with old ladies especially
coming in to get their results. once
one of the maintenance guys
didn't want to wait
and cracked the eggs
with something from his toolbelt. he was on camera
and ended up
being fired
and fined. and we had a compilation
of cctv attacks
on patients. security
sent us any new videos
they picked up - already by june
it was 20 minutes
long.